I just think that people are so weird about nudity and the human body. Sex is not bad, naked bodies are not bad and naked bodies don’t always have to be connected to sex.
I have two daughters, so I’m raising two future women. Maybe! I mean, one of them might be a guy later. It’s possible. It could happen. Someday one of my daughters could be like ‘Dad, I’m really a guy’ and I’ll be like ‘Alright well let’s get you a dick, honey. We’ll get you the nicest dick in town.’
Louis CK (reason #94826 why he’s the best comedian)
Somewhere along the way, Louis CK become society’s ideal father and I’m 100% okay with this.
why does everyone care about being mature for their age like maybe i fucking like drinking from juice boxes and eating my popcorn like a fucking lizard fight me about it
I think there comes a time when you meet someone and you just want to make them smile for the rest of your life.
The liquor one killed me
the con artist was the one that got me. I wish I could’ve seen the look on the vet’s face when they figured it out.
The faked injury and the binge drinking episode omg. A drunk dog. I just…
Even if we’re married for 23 years,
I still want you to flirt with me.
I hope we have breakfast together on the same table we fucked on the night before
When you love someone, it’s something.
When someone loves you, it’s another thing.
When you love the person who loves you back, it’s everything.
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